Downsizing Progress Report

Posted on May 1, 2013 by deb65

downsizingDownsizing is a slow process. The biggest challenge is coming across items that people made for me or gave to me; items that had a use in the past but which I no longer use.

What I’ve accomplished, limited, nevertheless, I filled a garbage bag. One bathroom, purged of extraneous things.

A plastic shoebox, filled with expired medications, is empty. I kept a few containers  -   just in case. . .

I’ve donated another shoebox full of old prescription eyeglasses. I kept two pairs  -   just in case. . .

The collections of sample-size lotions, shampoos, and conditioners,downsizing brought home as mementos of wonderful vacations, the complimentary toothbrushes, and the unused disposable razors, tossed. I kept a backup or two  -  just in case. . .

In case of what? What if I run out of supplies and need to return to a stash that is no longer available? I’m relieved to pare down, but will that be followed by regret?

Moving on, to the dresser, did not lead to moving anything out of the house. I know I have more socks than I will ever wear. Decisions, decisions. Since none of these things take up much space, I left them in the drawers.

I’d be happier if I was further along in the downsizing process. It’s just too hard to part with some things.

In a closet, I found a box of travel doodads, which forced me to take a second look at a butane powered hair curling iron and travel alarm clocks, none of which has seen the inside of a suitcase in many years. What do I do with the 220 volt fan that was a necessity before Europe found air-conditioning? Or the dual voltage travel iron or the set of strap-on luggage wheels? Why do I have so many luggage tags, suitcase locks, shower caps, travel-size tubes of toothpaste, etc. What should I keep? What should I toss?

Having written this, I’m heading back to re-visit the dresser. It’s time to remove some more items, if not to the garbage, then at least to a box that I will label and store. If I don’t access that box in the glasses_thumb.jpgnext six months, the box is going out of my house permanently.

Personal connections to items and items that could be of use in the future are the sticking points for me. And I haven’t even gone through an entire room yet!

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My Downsizing Plan

Posted on April 24, 2013 by deb65
downsizing

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I’m forging ahead with my downsizing plan while re-wiring my brain to feel good about the process and the expected results. Last week’s blog helped start the process. I’m hoping that I end up with these benefits:

 

 

 

  • less to clean, maintain, or repair
  • open space, shelves, and room
  • less stuff to worry about for the future
  • unburdening my survivors from dealing with my mess
  • good feelings of having given something to someone who could enjoy and appreciate it
  • happiness at overcoming my procrastination
  • comfort of living with only what I love, enjoy, use, and need

Some ways of moving the stuff out of your space:

  1. Return items to their owner (children) or the gift’s giver
  2. Donate items to someone or someplace where they can be appreciateddownsizing
  3. Have items appraised, sell them on-line or have a yard sale, take them to an auction, give them away for free
  4. Take photograph and make a memory book
  5. Toss out – anything chipped, broken, worn out, or useless

My plan is to focus on a few points that I hope will help along the way.

  • If I would not buy an item, even cheap at a yard sale  -  then I don’t need it.
  • If I’m not using and enjoying an item  -   it is time to move it out.
  • If I had to move to a smaller house  -   would I take it with me?
  • If I have more than one of the same item  -  I will choose only one to keep.
  • Allot a limited space for the items that I may need or use in the future.
  • Ask . . .Is this something that I NEED?

Other good downsizing tips:

http://www.seniorcitizensguide.com/articles/connecticut/downsizing.htm

This is a very thorough list of items and ideas of how to handle the processof downsizing: http://stowawayorganizing.com/pdf/downsizing_your_possessions.pdf

downsizingAs I begin this new round of downsizing, I’m going to take photos of the items that have meaning and emotions attached. These photos will surely make an odd eclectic mix, important only to me, but they will enable me to revisit the memories anytime I wish.

 

 

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Are you Ready to Downsize?

Posted on April 17, 2013 by deb65

downsizeWill your children (as adults) be left to clear out and clean up for you, or will you downsize now, before you run out of energy and time? How will you accomplish the overwhelming task of de-acquisitioning your lifetime of collections and just plain stuff? Will you bother to do it, or will you wait for a propelling crisis situation?

I pared down about 8 years ago, when I moved to a smaller home. But now, I feel the need to thin out my possessions once again. The problem is that this is hard physical and emotional work and I don’t know how to make the decisions.

My brain tells me that I don’t need all this stuff. Then I hear a voice that says, maybe someday I will be glad I have something that could be sold for money, if necessary, and maybe I’ll need this item in the future.  My emotions guide me to want to keep items that I no longer use, but which evoke an emotional connection to other people or sweet memories for me.

I’ve found some guidelines that I hope will help me and may also help my readers. According to Philip Moeller, in a US News article, “How to Downsize Your Possessions” (Nov. 22, 2011) the following items are most difficult to part with. (I’ve added my own comments)downsize

1. Family photos – digitalize and label the important ones (refer to previous blog on this subject)

2. Books – donate to the library

3. Collections – save only what you can display and enjoy

4. Antiques and favored furniture – offer to family members with the history attached

5. Symbols of other life stages – photograph the memories

6. National Geographic magazines – donate to schools, hospitals, businesses

7. Family heirlooms – offer to family members

8. Souvenirs and mementos – take photographs and move the items out

9. Clothing – donate

10. Stuff you’d planned to use in the future – limit the “keep” items to a box or closet

Looking at the list above, I notice the heavy emotional connection to the items. They bring to mind: family, experiences, locations, friends, vacations, value, joy. I recall where I was and who I was with when I bid on an item at an auction; I remember haggling with a vendor for a treasure while on a downsizevacation; I remember the gift giver of an item; I remember reading the book to my child; I remember the occasion on which I wore the dress.

No wonder we have such a hard time parting with our stuff.

For some ideas to get started  -   see my next blog.

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Living to the Millennium

Posted on April 10, 2013 by deb65
millennium

www.flickr.com

I lived to the millennium and beyond! As a kid, I remember figuring out what age I would be when the year 2000 rolled in, and wondering if I would still be alive. It seemed like such a long way into the future. And now I’m looking back to the year 2000. So this is what’s meant by “life is short.”

In youth the days are short and the years are long;

in old age the years are short and the days long.

~Nikita Ivanovich Panin

At age 30, I looked at my life as being 1/3 over. But then I began to think about adult life differently.  Age 30 would only be 10 years into adulthood.

At age 50, I wasn’t really fifty, but just thirty years into my adult status. Now at age 60+, I’m beginning the second half of adulthood.

Since the women in my family seem to have long lives, I prefer this new way of thinking. I’m feeling younger already.millennium

Life isn’t as short as it seems, but looking back makes it seem as though it’s gone by quickly. The length of my life hit me in a visual manner recently while filling out a form on the computer. I’m referring to the drop down menus where you have to choose the year of your birth, by scrolling down the list of years. That was a lot of scrolling, to go backwards from 2013 to the 1940’s. Shocking actually!

That made me wonder about all those years? Years? Where have they gone, what meaning do they have, how many do I have left to live?

To get a perspective on aging, have fun scrolling down through the years here. . .

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Health Symptoms/Solutions

Posted on April 3, 2013 by deb65

healthAs I age, health becomes more of a daily concern. I wonder what could be causing this annoying symptom? Haven’t we all gotten a sickness blaming it on what we recently ate? Or received an inoculation/vaccination and then come down with an illness, blaming the vaccine?

Probably you’ve seen the miracle cures advertised, and wonder if you should give some a try. Don’t I need those vitamins specifically for my eye health? Maybe I’d feel less tired if I used that energy boosting drink?

Perhaps I should really just make a doctor appointment and discuss my symptoms? But, I convince myself, that I don’t want any more medications to add to my daily regimen.

Here’s a list of some of some excuses and reasons and explanations that I’ve heard from others or thought about myself. I’m sure you could add to this list.

  • I must be allergic to . . .health
  • Maybe it’s the bad _____ that I ate.
  • I think maybe I mixed up my medications.
  • I think I have _____ (a new illness).
  • I’m going to stop taking/start taking _____ and see if I feel better.
  • I think it’s all the stress in my life.
  • When I eat 6 cherries a day, my arthritis improves.
  • This bracelet really is helping to improve my balance.
  • The homeopath, chiropractor, acupuncturist is curing all my ailments.
  • My grandmother’s reasoning:  her dupuytren’s contracture was caused by the years of pounding on her can opener.

Maybe all these possibilities are probable causes/solutions, who knows? Maybe they are effective because of the very real placebo effect, the mind-body connection to wellness, a physical cure which is the result of a belief, described well by the American Cancer Society. Holistic heath may be the best approach.

healthKeeping track of health symptoms and their possible causes is such a tedious game, involving patience and persistence. My Dad’s meticulous record keeping of his personal health, always surprised his doctors.

For now, I’m hoping that the next food that I eliminate from my diet will be the one that stops the itching, and I don’t care if it is the result of a placebo effect.

 

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Out of Touch With Reality

Posted on March 27, 2013 by deb65

nerd-2_thumb.jpgAfter a recent visit to a large office supply store, I returned home feeling that I am truly out of touch with reality. What I experienced would not have shocked me if I was in a city, but this was such an uncharacteristic occurrence in rural Pennsylvania.

While in the store I needed some help with pricing an item. The clerk behind the counter looked like he belonged in the circus sideshow. He wasearlobe-2_thumb.jpg probably mid-twenties, a little overweight, and had tattoos completely covering both arms. In addition, his nose held a nose ring, and his dangling looped ear lobes wobbled as he spoke. I guess the store must have rules about wearing huge ear gauges on the job.

After getting help from him, he directed me to the store manager, who was talking to another employee, ponytail guy.  Don’t get me wrong, I love long hair, but prefer the usual well-groomed gray-haired employees.

Then I noticed the nerd with the heavy black framed glasses who was helping customers with a computer.

Walking down an aisle was a troll; this employee must have just come out from under a bridge, as he looked a little weather-beaten and unkempt.

Next I approached the check-out counter. At the back of the checkout line stood a woman with a winter coat over a dragon costume, tail leprechaun-2_thumb.jpgdragging on the floor.  Behind the counter stood the leprechaun clerk, with a wildly bushy head of red hair and beard.

I’m glad that I don’t manage a store where I have to hire people. If the employees’ appearance is any indication of the available work force, it’s no wonder people can’t find jobs. I actually like a little individuality, but this was like walking into a fairytale movie set. Is this the new normal?

 

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Visiting My First House From Childhood

Posted on March 20, 2013 by deb65

Alaska3_thumb.jpgI had an opportunity to visit my first house from childhood. The experience came recently and brought an unexpected jarring of memory and emotion.

Diagonally across the street from my grandparent’s house is the house that was my first home as a baby. For the first three or four years of my life, this is where I lived.

I’d always known the location of the house, but had not been inside since my childhood. I still remember my parents being friends with the neighbors, whose names I recall. We had a large swing set constructed by my father from heavy metal pipes and a grassy yard that we shared. Our side back door opened onto the yard where I played with the neighbor boy.

A friend of mine mentioned that she had a friend who wanted some help with her computer, so I offered my assistance. Eventually we connected and I was invited to her home. I soon realized that her home was the same one Ilived in as a child. I looked forward to meeting and helping her, but now, I also anticipated a glimpse into the house where my first experiences and memories were formed.

Prior to going to the house, I thought that I had no real memory of the house itself. Stepping onto the porch and standing at the front door, felt just a tad familiar. After meeting the owner and while sitting in the front living room for conversation, I began to feel tinges of remembrances, which I can’t quite describe. Although I didn’t really recognize the space, it was very comfortable.

my first house

My Childhood Home

Suddenly, to my wonder, I felt a sense of my baby brother crying from the second floor. I didn’t think that I had any distinct memories of my brother. He was born when I was only two years old, with a digestive system abnormality, and lived only 6 months. My mother says that after his death, I repeatedly asked, “Where’s my David?” Until that moment, the only memory that I thought I had was from an old photo.

My new friend then led me to the second floor, where we worked together on her computer. I soon realized that we were sitting in what was my childhood bedroom.

I was totally taken by surprise at the unexpected emotional connection that this house seemed to invoke.

Alaska2_thumb.jpgI feel fortunate to have these two experiences with two houses of my past: my childhood home and the home of my grandparents (written about in the previous blog). I’m not sure why I’ve been blessed by these two chance encounters, but I’m appreciative.

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Visiting a House from Childhood

Posted on March 13, 2013 by deb65

house from childhoodI relived memories by a visit to a house from my childhood that belonged to my paternal grandparents. They lived in the town where I grew up, the same town where I now live. My grandfather died when I was 13 and my grandmother continued to live in the two-story brick house, until her death in 1979, at age 92.

house from childhood

Grandparents’ Home

For many years, my daughter and I lived at the other end of the same street. One of the attractions for me, in buying our house, was the similarity to my grandmother’s house. Both kitchens had yellow tiles on the walls, red countertops, and white cabinets and trim. The bathrooms were either pink or pink and blue tiles, with matching built-in towel bars and soap dishes.

During a summer day, while reading the ads for yard sales, I noticed the former address of my grandparents’ home. I called my daughter to join me and we went to the sale and began a conversation with the woman running the sale. Her mother joined the discussion and it turned out that following my grandma’s death, this was the family who purchased the house and lived there ever since.

house from childhoodThey kindly invited us to see the interior of the house. I was totally amazed; it looked as if my grandmother still lived there. Nothing had changed in more than 40 years – with the exception of different furniture! The living room was lacking natural light and still had the heavy dark woodwork and floors that I remembered. The same wallpaper covered the walls. The ceiling light fixtures were still there, with the original pink bulbs. On the wall, the unusual push button light switches remained. A telephone sat on a table where my grandma had her phone. The dining room had a corner cupboard exactly where my grandmother’s stood. I described the second floor, and the owner said it was just as I remembered: pink tiled bathroom, pink toilet, pink house from childhoodsink, 3 bedrooms, and a big closet (that my grandma used as a dressing room). I was so tempted to open the door under the stairway, where Grandma stored the toys.

We were thrilled to experience Grandma’s house again, letting the memories surface, more than thirty years later.

In the next blog I will relate another unusual house visit.

 

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A Good Night of Sleep?

Posted on February 27, 2013 by deb65

good night of sleepWhat I wouldn’t do for a night of sleep, a good night of sleep, all night long! In the past I would rarely say, “I didn’t sleep well.” Now it’s the norm. Three hours of sleep without waking is something to celebrate! Who would have known?

My sleep patterns are totally messed up: can’t get to sleep, can’t stay asleep, can’t get awake, can’t stay awake. I get relaxed and comfortable, my mind calmed, and think that sleep is imminent, only to still be awake two hours later, while arranging and rearranging my body. Once asleep, I awake feeling over-heated, or wake up feeling ready to get up and start a new day; except that when the new day actually arrives, I’m too tired to get going.

The more I read about the importance of sleep and the effects of lack ofnight of sleep sleep, the more concerned I become. Sleep is not only restorative for the body, it is the time when memories are solidified and problems are solved. For normal healthy people who sleep 8 hours a night, sleep occurs in 4-5 cycles per night. For older adults, the cycles are fewer and shorter, leaving less quality sleep time.

Scientists have studied links between sleep quality and brain changes that impede the ability to remember newly learned information. Normal aging includes brain atrophy, which obviously affects brain functions. However, disruptive sleep patterns are also a factor for many older people. The lack of sleep negatively effects memory function, as studied by researchers at Berkeley and published in the online edition of Nature Neuroscience.

According to the Pew Research Center, 25% of us over the age of 50, have problems sleeping. This is troubling. The same study found that 34% of all adults take naps, and 52% of those over age 80 take naps. Perhaps those naps, if they are long enough, are really important to brain function and memory retention.

The causes of not sleeping well, range from sleep apnea to the influence of medications. As a result of poor sleep, more serious memory or even heart problems result.

This infograph covers everything you many want to know about sleep.

good night of sleepDoctors give all kinds of suggestions for improving sleep, but none I’ve tried could be considered cures. Although the expression “sleeping like a baby” may infer a good night’s sleep, it really should mean the kind of sleep I get, wake, sleep, wake, sleep, watch TV, eat, bathroom, sleep, wake. I’d just like to “sleep like a log” every once in a while.

 

 

 

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Income Tax Preparation Blues

Posted on February 20, 2013 by deb65

income tax preparationI’m singing, “celebrate, celebrate, dance to the music,” because I have just completed my income tax preparation paperwork to take to my accountant!

It’s been a miserable week. Earlier this month I moved all of the 2012 paperwork from my files to a big shoebox, to sort through at a later date. I tried to get motivated to attack this project, but found too many other things to entertain my time.

I started the week saying that I would get to this project, in fact, I told myself that I would not clean house or do laundry until the taxes were prepared. I went out to join friends, planned a trip, read a good book, shopped, and slept, all so I would be physically unavailable to do the dreaded task. It wasn’t long until the laundry bucket overflowed and cat hair drifted in the air.

If there is a time of year that I wish for a husband who was good with paperworkincome tax preparation  and income tax preparation documents, this is it. But then I recall my own father’s stress and miserable demeanor with the approach of April 15.

Certainly, no one likes tax preparation, but maybe some people are more suited to the job. For years, I filled out everything myself. Then came an audit, and an error was found. I suffered an instant meltdown, embarrassed, scared, and humiliated. I  hired an accountant to sort out the mess, at a cost I could not easily afford.

Later, when tax preparation software became available, I could follow and respond to the simple prompts without too much anxiety. These days I use the skills of an accountant.

Income tax preparation surely doesn’t get easier with age.  I suspect that soon I’ll take the whole box of papers to the accountant, without any pre-preparation on my part at all. I expect it will cost the equivalent of a small vacation for the service, but some things are better left to others to complete.

Today, I’m a happy woman, ready to clean my house and do some laundry (routine stress-free tasks) while singing along with the Three Dog Night.

 

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